A stage of our own: Closure, 2nd movement

When Watanabe was out of sight, Sashihara and Maeda approached Kashiwagi. The three of them continued their way to the dressing room, when they arrived, the atmosphere was different from the morning; it changed back into the usual after a hard day’s practice. The day had ended for the group, but it wasn’t over for Maeda and Kashiwagi, since they still had an unfinished conversation. When Kashiwagi and Maeda were about to leave they were approached by Sashihara and Takahashi respectively. Sashihara asked Kashiwagi to accompany her do some errands, while Takahashi invited Maeda to a café to talk.

Sashihara and Kashiwagi left first and headed to a nearby groceries store. Takahashi and Maeda left a couple of minutes later and went to a café near Shinjuku station. After they finished Sashihara’s errands, both gals went for some drinks to a pastry store just across the street from the market. They sat near the window, it was 1800 and the sky was getting dark, so the city lights started to function.

They both ordered a cherry tea and some sweets, as they waited Sashihara skillfully noticed Kashiwagi’s uneasiness after the day’s practice. As one of the most trusted companions Kashiwagi had, Sashihara entered no man’s land and pop the dangerous question.

Sashihara: Are you ok, Yukirin? You’ve been acting odd today….

Kashiwagi: ….well there is something that is bothering me…

Sashihara: is it something you can’t tell Mayuyu?

Kashiwagi: …maybe…it’s a bit complicated to explain and I know she wouldn’t understand…

Sashihara: well I may be able to help, sometimes, just being listened helps too…

Kashiwagi: …thanks…

Sashihara: well I’m all ears!

Kashiwagi: ….actually…yesterday…I received a confession…

Sashihara: what!!? Someone confessed to you?

Kashiwagi: ….yes…

Little by little, Kashiwagi’s courage and clear mind started to return. But why was it so hard to talk about her feelings with Maeda? That suffocating sensations had departed, was Maeda too much for her to handle? Such thoughts were casting a mist of indecision and fear in the deepest corner of Kashiwagi’s heart. Sashihara’s interest I the situation became even harder to contain, but at the same time Kashiwagi wanted some to listen to her, someone who wouldn’t judge her, someone who would just lend her a shoulder to lie on for a moment. Kashiwagi always felt comfortable alongside Sashihara, whom she saw as a reliable person to talk to.

Sashihara was consumed by her curiosity, but decided not to go deeper into the issue, as she understood, that because of that confession, Kashiwagi wasn’t her usual self. She exerted extreme self-control, even though her curiosity was itching her for an answer.

Sashihara: It probably was just a crazy fan Yukirin…you should tell the management…well that’s what I would do…

Kashiwagi: ….it wasn’t a fan….it was….

Sashihara: …

Intrigued by Kashiwagi’s response, Sashihara couldn’t hold herself back; she had to know about whom was Kashiwagi talking. She took a deep breath and timidly continued the conversation trying not to meddle more than what Kashiwagi wanted to tell her.

Sashihara: Is that person related to AKB?

Kashiwagi: ….

Sashihara: I thought so…who is it?

Kashiwagi: …..A….Acchan!

Sashihara’s surprise was such that she felt like a boulder had been dropped in front of her. She never imagined that Maeda had such feelings towards a gal, especially towards Kashiwagi. After knowing the cause, she understood better the dilemma that Kashiwagi was facing. It was not answering back her feelings, but saying those words, could jeopardize both their carriers as idols. A mutual strong desire was perceived by Sashihara, for when Kashiwagi mentioned Maeda she did it with a huge smile, but also Kashiwagi was worried about Maeda’s future more than her own.

Sashihara: So you tried to reply to her today?

Kashiwagi: ….yes…I did…but I couldn’t say those words to her…Sasshi, I really wanted to say to her I also love her!

Sashihara jumped from her seat after Kashiwagi’s words, yes she already knew something like that was the situation. Everyone had noticed that after the filming of Hanazakari no Kimitachi e, both ladies grew close but nobody imagined they would so close as to develop feelings of yearning and deep emotional affection-i.e. love-for each other. What Sashihara didn’t expect was that it was Maeda the one that made a move on Kashiwagi.

Sashihara’s jump sacred Kashiwagi a bit, when she noticed that she sat quickly and took a zip of her tea to lower her heart beat. The city lights now engulf the surroundings, and it was getting late. Sashihara had received an e-mail from her mother asking where she was and about the grocery. But again she wanted to help Kashiwagi, so the told Kashiwagi she had to return home and invited her to sleep over. To which Kashiwagi replied in with an affirmative response. She called her mother as so did Sashihara to inform about the sleep over plan.

On the other side of the aisle Takahashi was talking things over with Maeda. Takahashi somewhat understood the position at which Kashiwagi was when trying to give her answer to Maeda; between them, it was Kashiwagi’s position the hardest, for not only was the one that had to respond but was also a captain. Maeda was staring at the table as she somewhat regretted confessing to Kashiwagi.

Maeda: I’m a terrible person, right, Minami-chan?

Takahashi: Of course not! Why would you think such a thing?!

Maeda: Because, I’m not normal, I mean I’m in love with a gal and I’ve put her on a tight spot, because of my selfishness…

Takahashi: Come on Acchan; don’t get down on me right now! You’re just fine the way you are. You are normal! Don’t be ashamed about what you feel for others. Yukirin just needs a little more time…

Maeda: ….but…because of me she is in a predicament…

Takahashi: Look Acchan, you did the right thing by telling her how you feel, it’s now up to her to sort things out. She wants to sincerely answer to you, but still unsure. Today she tried but she couldn’t, perhaps because I was there…I still don’t get why called me there Acchan…

Maeda: ….actually I was afraid of Yukirin’s answer, and I wanted you to control me…just in case I couldn’t stop crying…

Takahashi: So you think she’ll reject you?

Maeda: ….

Maeda was feeling very troubled, because she felt she put her dear friend in an awkward position. Takahashi feeling worried for her friends, she felt as she needed to do something to get rid of the tension between them but didn’t wanted to rush Kashiwagi or Maeda.

Takahashi: Just give her some time.

They drank some tea and sweet bread, as they talked about other issues to relieve themselves from the stressful day. Then they parted ways and headed home. Whilst at Sashihara Rino’s house, after a pleasant dinner and a warm bath the strategy meeting began. Sashihara’s mother brought some hot chocolate and pastry for the gals so they could enjoy a bit more their conversation. It had been raining and cold lately so the warmth of the chocolate was welcomed by both of them.

Sashihara: So, Yukirin…what are you planning to do?

Kashiwagi: Well…I really don’t know, but I’m pretty sure about how I feel….I think…

Sashihara: But, you told me at the café that you, feel the same towards Acchan, didn’t you?

Kashiwagi: …yes…it’s just that I don’t know how to tell her…but I also don’t want to cause her any problems or to anyone on the group, because of my selfish acts…

Sashihara: You aren’t causing problems Yukirin! I mean you are not breaking any rules… I mean they said we couldn’t date outsiders and they specified males, they never said that we couldn’t go out with each other or even develop a relationship as deep as yours and Acchan…So I believe you should answer with your true feelings.

Kashiwagi: …I guess so….

Sashihara: So spirits up…..Oh!! I have an idea; do you remember about the concert that we have next week in Okinawa??

Kashiwagi couldn’t comprehend why Sashihara was so excited about. True that Okinawa meant warmer weather and beautiful beaches, but still she didn’t get what it means in relationship with her “issue” with Maeda.

Sashihara stood up and went for a catalogue about Okinawa she got from Katayama Haruka. She flipped through the pages until she got to the hotel sections. Kashiwagi just couldn’t keep up with Sashihara’s excitement; she though “why is she so excited? What does the trip and a hotel in Okinawa has to do with me and Acchan?” A few seconds later Kashiwagi’s questions were answered. Sashihara had found what she was looking for…the mostly likely hotel that AKB would stay during their 15 days in Okinawa. She showed Kashiwagi the hotel, she thought AKB was the most likely to stay and presented her plan to still oblivious Kashiwagi.

Sashihara: I found it, Yukirin!

Kashiwagi: What; found what?!

Sashihara: This is the hotel we will probably be staying during our visit to Okinawa!

Kashiwagi: ….

Sashihara: In this hotel as always we will be paired into couples per room!

Kashiwagi: ...so…

Sashihara: We just have to make sure you and Acchan get paired as room-mates!

Kashiwagi: What!? Are you crazy, you want to give me a heart attack!?

Sashihara laughed uncontrollably at Kashiwagi’s reaction. Kashiwagi’s face was so red that it could be seen from the moon Yes Sashihara’s incredible plan was to get Kashiwagi and Maeda together, so that they could talk more comfortably and clear their situation. When Sashihara was able to control her laughter, she took a deep breath and continued her briefing.

Sashihara: …sorry about that…it’s just that you looked so cute with your red face

Kashiwagi: ….Sasshi, you are…evil!

Sashihara: You see, the only way for to be able to tell Acchan how you feel is by being with her, you said Takamina was also there, right!?

Kashiwagi: …yes she was with Acchan, and she also knew about what happened between Acchan and me.

Sashihara: Really!? Do you know how she found out?

Kashiwagi: …well, Acchan told her…I understand that…I mean Takamina-san is Acchan’s best friend, so it’s comprehensible that she talked to her about that…I think…

Those words gave Sashihara another great idea how to make her plan work! She thought that probably Takahashi also wanted to help solve this knot in their relationship.

Nobody in AKB could’ve imaged that Maeda and Kashiwagi would’ve ended in such a complicated relationship. Both Sashihara and Takahashi were also in a tight spot, as they became impromptu counselors for Maeda and Kashiwagi. “The next concert in Okinawa was going to determine if this was a forbidden love on Maeda’s side or Kashiwagi’s destined soul-mate!” Sashihara thought, she then continued with the conversation.

Sashihara: Well…leave everything to me!

Kashiwagi: You’re worrying me Sasshi…but thank you for helping me!

Kashiwagi smiled and the conversation then shifted into a different type of gal talk. Sunday came and went slowly for the gals, as the date of departure for Okinawa arrived. Early Monday morning, Kashiwagi arrived to the theater to meet the staff and discuss the voyage’s details. Also present at that meeting were Takahashi Minami and Akimoto Sayaka, theater Staff Manager Togasaki and General Producer Akimoto. During this meeting Kashiwagi tried to concentrate as much as possible, but her mind was thinking mostly about Maeda. It was decided during this meeting, that the pairing for the hotel was going to be done trough a draw. This draw was to be held at the theater 2 days before departure. As soon as the meeting was over, Kashiwagi received an e-mail on her mobile phone. She then quickly navigated through the message in search for the number that was used to send it. All of a sudden Kahsiwagi jumped of excitement, which startled Takahashi and Akimoto as they left the theater. Takahashi approached Kashiwagi and asked: “Yukirin are you alright?” Kashiwagi slowly turned her eyes on Takahashi and answered in a low and embarrassed tone: “Yes, I’m ok, sorry scare you1’ she bowed in apology to all present, then she returned to reading her e-mail. Takahashi’s curiosity had awakened so she decided to walk for a while with Kashiwagi. “Who could’ve been that e-mailed Yukirin, to make her this happy? Maybe Acchan!?” she thought. She asked Kashiwagi to accompany to this new traditional tea house near Ginza that she wanted to visit. Kashiwagi with a polite smile and happy disposition she agreed.

They arrived at a traditional style house and were received by a young lady wearing a red kimono with sakura patterns, a blue obi. Her hair was arranged in the traditional style, she was also wearing traditional make-up. She greeted them in a polite and gracious manner, then escorted them inside, after the main gate they walked through a garden, the path they walked through was surrounded by sakura and plum trees. A small bridge linked the tea house with the entry pathway. The tea house was made of cedar wood. The doors were made also cedar with Japanese traditional paper. The hostess suddenly stopped and opened a door that leads to a small room with a beautiful view of the garden; she then bowed to the astonished gals. Kashiwagi and Takahashi quickly entered the room, amazed of the beautiful scenery, the hostess bowed again; as she left the girls she smiled and closed the door. On the table at the center of the room there was a bell and a menu letter with instructions of how to use the tea house’s rooms. They explored actively the room in search of what surprises they might find. Kashiwagi found a stash of tea and Takahashi a pot to boil water; they smiled at each other and started to prepare their tea. The attending hostess returned to the room to deliver some dango for the gals, she then left them again. As they prepared the tea Takahashi asked Kashiwagi: “You look really lively this afternoon, something good happened?” Kashiwagi responded with an affirmative nod. To which Takahashi followed up with another question, “Is it related to Acchan?” an uncontrollable silence engulfed the room.

Kashiwagi raised her sight and stared at Takahashi’s eyes as firmly as she could and smiled and proceeded to reply.

Kashiwagi: Yes, she sent me a mail, asking if I was ok! That made me very happy!

Takahashi: I thought so…So what are you going to do about your relationship her?

Kashiwagi startled a bit after that question. She knew what she had to do but after all she was still unsure about what she wanted.

She couldn’t keep herself unsure anymore after Takahashi’s words; she had to take that step she was afraid of. She either played it safe and rejected Maeda or risked it all and embrace that mutual desire for each other’s company and affection.

Takahashi: You can’t stay like this forever Yukirin…Acchan made her choice and went forward, even those she’s scared of the consequences, she feels that strongly about you.

Kashiwagi: …I…know but…

Takahashi: But what? No buts!? You have to make up your mind!

For Takahashi, Maeda’s happiness was everything even if it meant to relinquish her dearest friend. Takahashi was also unsure about her feelings towards Kashiwagi’s entrance into Maeda’s life, was it jealousy? Was it anger? Was it solitude? She was also trying to sort out her own feelings.

Kashiwagi: …You’re right, I must stick to my decision without regret and stand tall in front of its consequences…

The water started to boil…Kashiwagi picked a bit of mint and cherry herbs to add to the water, this was taught to her by Saeki, whom had also told her to stand with her feelings. As she poured the herbs in the water she thought to herself “What is it I’m afraid of?” Takahashi place her had on top of Kashiwagi as she had finished and smiled. She then asked with a clam yet serious tone “So, Yukirin, what’s your answer to Acchan’s confession?” Kashiwagi reverted herself back into her yips, but the water vapor and smell of the herbal infusion brought her back. The sweet smell made her confidence return, and with a voice full of confidence, and honesty she said “Takamina-san, I also love Acchan with my most sincere feelings! I understand if you refuse, but as Acchan’s best friend and as my sempai, please bless us!” she then firmly bowed in a humble request for approval of the person that Maeda respected and cherished the most. Takahashi’s face was blushed and her hands were shaking; she never expected Kashiwagi to do such a thing. She grabbed a dango and placed her cup to serve herself some of Kashiwagi’s special herbal infusion. Kashiwagi quickly took the pot and served Takahashi.

Kashiwagi had entered her comfort zone; she was raised to become a Yamato Nadeshiko, the virtues of beauty, femininity are portrait in Kashiwagi at its best, the traditional concepts combined with the sense of the modern woman gave Kashiwagi an attractive and distinguished taste, this was what attracted Maeda to her, until this moment Takahashi had finally understood, Kashiwagi’s true charm. She raised her sight to meet with Kashiwagi’s eyes, and with a smile and tears she blessed Kashiwagi and Maeda’s relationship.

Takahashi: Yukirin…I entrust Acchan to you…but if you ever make her cry I’ll never forgive you!

Kashiwagi: Thank you Takamina-san…

Takahashi: Now you must tell Acchan!

Kashiwagi: …Well…Sasshi said that the Okinawa trip was my best chance to answer back to Acchan…

Takahashi, found in this words her most powerful ally in her quest to get Maeda and Kashiwagi together. This ally was none other than Sashihara!

The finale is going to be a special....Want to know what happens at Okinawa? Well in the FINALE chapter of my first fanfic, that's what it'll be all about! Also don't forget about this: http://whitesfanficspot.blogspot.com/2012/02/just-sharing-stuff.html The best idea will be turned into a fic. A collaboration between the winner and me!!

Just sharing stuff!!

I'm not going to limit this space just for fan fiction, but I'll also share some fan interest stuff! Today I'll leave you with some Yukirin videos I like:
I will also take the time to thank sincerely everybody that supports this blog with their visits. I'm just starting here so please look up for more fun and cool stuff to come!! I'll leave you the following pictures with an assignment: CRACK A PLOT!!! My next attempt may be based on your plot! So do you accept my challenge?

In the following 2 post I'll be concluding A Stage of our own-perhaps in one long post!-so bear with me!!

A stage of our own: Closure, 1rst movement

The atmosphere in the locker room, that day was different, than normal. With a hurt and depressed Watanabe, a usual Kashiwagi and a joyous Maeda, it felt a like an emotion’s parade. Kashiwagi then whispered in Maeda’s ear, to which she replied with a smile and a nod. Everyone except Takahashi was unaware of why this morning had started in such a violent manner. When Takahashi saw Maeda’s reaction to Kashiwagi’s whisper, she felt a huge relief that at least things looked promising for her dear friend.

All the gals finished changing, and headed, the tension was still high after what happened in the locker room. But this didn’t show during practice, when the break arrived the gals assembled for their lunch as usual except that Kashiwagi and Takahashi had gone into a separate area at Maeda’s request, when Watanabe heard that, her curiosity rose and decide to follow them, but before she could do so, she was distracted by Yonechan, those seconds were enough to lose sight of them. Kashiwagi, Maeda and Takahashi sat down in a separate spot form the rest on the other side of the stage, hidden from the rest of the group by the prolonged catwalk that divided the stadium by half. Seeing that neither Kashiwagi nor Maeda would start the conversation, Takahashi decided to open it.

Takahashi: So, Acchan, why did you call me here?

Maeda: ….

Kashiwagi: Is there something wrong, Acchan? If you need to talk to Takamani, I’ll excuse myself, we can talk later.

Maeda: ….Actually I need to speak with both….

Takahashi: I think I’m an extra in this conversation, I’ll excuse myself…

Maeda: Minami-chan….Please stay….Yukiriso, the truth is that I tolled Minami-chan, about what I told you, yesterday…

Kashiwagi: eh…..!?

Kashiwagi was bit surprised but at the same time she felt a bit of relive knowing that Takahashi was aware. It was a well known fact that Maeda and Takahashi were really so close, so it felt kind of natural to Kashiwagi that Maeda commented this with Takahashi.

Maeda: Sorry, Yukiriso….but I know Minami-chan can be trusted to keep this a secret…

Kashiwagi: No, worries, actually I’m relieved that you told Takamina-san, she has the right to know!

Maeda: Yukiriso….

Takahashi; So, I’m going to bear witness to Yukirin’s answer? Or I’m here to stop a fight?

Maeda: ….well…

Kashiwagi: I’m going to give you my answer, Acchan….Takamina-san, I know this might sound hard to you, but I want to know your opinion as Acchan’s best friend after I’ve told her my answer to her feelings…

Takahashi: Wow, Yukirin you amaze me, in less than one day you got your mind and heart cleared!

Kashiwagi: I counted on really good advice from that person….

Takahashi: From whom?

Maeda: I’ve been wondering who was this other person you told me about Yukiriso, is she the same person?

Kashiwagi: …Yes…

Takahashi: ok, let’s cut with the mystery, then who’s your reliable advisor Yukirin?

Kashiwagi: Mikachii!

Maeda and Takashi where surprised to found that the special person for Kashiwagi was Saeki Mika, but it made sense for them. As told before the two gals were really close. Maeda’s anxiety was starting to grow, when Kashiwagi finally said her answer to Maeda’s feelings.

Kashiwagi: Acchan…it’s not an easy answer, because I know this can only bring complications, but my heart and mind are at peace…

Takahashi: ….

Maeda: ….

Kashiwagi: …my feelings for you are clear. I couldn’t stop thinking about your sincere words, and wanted to answer with the same sentiment. The truth is that I, Yukirin…

The tension started to rise, as the break winded down. Every second that passed was an eternity of its own for Maeda and Kashiwagi. She had the words in the tip of her tongue but they proven to be a bit difficult for Kashiwagi to say. To ease the difficultness from Kashiwagi, Maeda turned to see Takahashi and then returned her sight to Kashiwagi:

Maeda: It’s alright if you need more time, Yukiriso! I can wait; I’m in no hurry for your answer…

Kashiwagi: I know what I want to say, and what I feel for you Acchan…though it’s a bit hard for me to say, but I have to answer to you…

Takahashi: Acchan, it seems Yukirin made up her, just like when you confessed to her. Now you must listen to her words.

Maeda: …You’re right Minami-chan! Sorry Yukiriso….

Kashiwagi: …well, what I want to say is that…

She felt as if those words, didn’t want to come out, she thought she had confidence enough in herself to say them, but they didn’t come out. Never so few words were this hard to say for her. She knew this three words, would change her life. Afraid of losing that she grew to love but at the same time wanting express her true feelings, caused her clear mind to become fuzzy and unclear. Before she could even finish those words, a voice on the background yelled “Ok, everyone! Break is over!” At that moment Takahashi took both Kashiwagi and Maeda by their hands, and said “we can do this later” to which both gals knotted in an affirmative fashion. Kashiwagi felt bad that she couldn’t reply to Maeda the way she wanted. The three of them parted ways for the rehearsals.

When Kashiwagi rejoined with her team, she was anxiously received all its members. One of her duties as captain was to lead the team in their battle cry-cheer-but she couldn’t fully focus on her duties, and was absent minded during most of that practice. On the other side of the struggle Maeda, counting on Takahashi’s support decided that it was for the best to concentrate only on the practice for the remainder of the day. When the practice ended the actions took place again at the locker-dressing– room, where Watanabe decided that it was finally the time to confront Kashiwagi out her abnormal behavior. As she walked on the aisle fully immersed in her thought, Watanabe grabbed her should in order to draw her attention. The move worked and Kashiwagi turned her eyes to Watanabe, when their eyes met a slight smile broke among them. Suddenly Watanabe’s expression turned into a serious and the scolding and ranting began for the already anxious and downed Kashiwagi.

Watanabe: What’s the matter with you Yukirin? You’re not your regular self; you know you can tell me anything!?

Kashiwagi: ….nothing….I’m alright…

Watanabe insisted in her examination of Kashiwagi’s elusive answer. Sashihara and Maeda were passing by when they say the scene Watanabe was creating. Like if Kashiwagi had a Maeda-sensor integrated in her eyes, she immediately changed her focus from Watanabe to Maeda and Sashihara. Watanabe noticed this and quickly charged at Kashiwagi for ignoring her.

Watanabe: Stop ignoring Yukirin!? You really are acting different today!

Kashiwagi: No, I’m not; it’s just that you are…

Watanabe; I am what? Annoying…that’s what you want to say, right!?

Kashiwagi: No, of course not…it’s just that….I’m not feeling well today.

Watanabe: ……sorry if I’ve been too noisy and childish today…is there anything I can do to help?

Kashiwagi: Thanks…but no, this is something I have to take care by myself…

Less worried, Watanabe smiled again and headed to the locker room with a cheering disposition, think that the only thing she could do now was to cheer on her friend in this crossroad.

The finale is at the workshop....hope you stick with me! Next Closure 2nd Movement!

A stage of our own 4: Sensus & Affectus

It had begun…one of or the most difficult conversations the gals ever had, one that would change their lives forever. Kashiwagi was it a state of catatonic immobility for a moment after Maeda’s puzzling confession. Unlike before they aren’t strangers, but 2 really close friends, so Kashiwagi felt the need to come in aid of her friend, to whose feelings she was unaware. On the other hand, Maeda didn’t want to alienate Kashiwagi from her, after presenting her feelings for her. But she couldn’t keep them a secret any longer, if she didn’t express them to her, she thought she would explode. Also Maeda was aware that if she didn’t make the first move, Kashiwagi, wouldn’t notice the way Maeda felt towards her. Moments after her shock, Kashiwagi’s conscience returned to her body, releasing her from her catatonic immobility, and attempted to return to the conversion.

Kashiwagi: *cough*, so is she someone I know??

Maeda was struggling with this question, but she had to reply honestly, if not the whole point of the date would have been lost, and they would stay friends for ever, that was her line of thinking.

Maeda: ….Yes, you kind of know her………

Kashiwagi: is she in AKB??

Maeda:…..yes……

Kashiwagi: hmmm, well then have told her, that you like her?

Maeda:…… not yet…..

Kahiwagi: you should tell her, if not she probably won’t find out!!

Maeda: ….that’s what I’m trying to do….

Kashiwagi: what did you say, Acchan?

Kashiwagi was puzzled by Maeda’s last comment, and returned to her catatonic immobility, but felt a form of relief from that remark. Thinking it was now or never Maeda gathered all her courage, grabbed Kashiwagi’s hand, took a deep breath, face Kashiwagi while blushing and finally said it:

Maeda: Yukiriso, what I’m saying is that…

Kashiwagi: ……

Maeda: I’m saying that…I…I…LOVE YOU, YUKIRISO!!!!

Kashiwagi: eeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhh!?

Maeda, finally said, those words, she kept secret form long ago, and felt relieved, but now the ball was on Kashiwagi’s side of the pitch. Still in catatonic immobility, she felt like a bomb had been dropped onto her. Despite her lethargic state, she was well aware of what had happened, but still couldn’t believe it herself. The moon was already dominating the sky and the city lights lit up the horizon, Kashiwagi felt like running to the subway and return home immediately, but she couldn’t leave like that.

Maeda: I, said it already, that’s what I wanted to say…

Kashiwagi: ……you….love me?....I really don’t know what to say Acchan

Maeda: You have the right to get mad at me, for I’m a sick person, but I can’t stop these feelings I have for you…..

Kashiwagi, I’m not mad, Acchan, it’s just that I don’t know how to answer to you right now. I never expected this…

Maeda: I know, neither did I, but whatever you reply to me, please let’s still be friends!

Kashiwagi: at least that I can promise, then I think we should part ways for today, we have rehearsals for Wednesday’s concert!

Maeda: Sure, then I’ll see you tomorrow?

Kashiwagi: Yeah, I hope to be able to answer your feelings by tomorrow! See you then…

Maeda: Bye!

Both gals parted ways, and returned to their homes, with their fare share of unanswered questions, and their bit of answers. Just as Kashiwagi was on the train, she received a mail on her phone, it was from, the other person that was special for her. Maeda arrived quickly at home and bathe, feeling relived that she finally expressed her true sentiments for Kashiwagi, but still anxious about what her answer to those it would be. She ate her dinner and went to bed early, she wanted to arrive early to the practice, to not be surprised by Kashiwagi, as she turned off the lights and closed her eyes, she thought about her.

When Kashiwagi arrived home, she called, Saeki Mika, an old friend, whom she trusted blindly. She was the mysterious person, Kashiwagi told Maeda about, before Saeki’s injury and graduation, it was an open secret, that those two were really close. Even after her graduation, both gals keep close contact, and serve as confidants of each other.  Kashiwagi told Saeki about the card-the other person knowing about it was Love-tan-and also asked for advice. Saeki, mailed Kashiwagi to see how it went. Just as Kashiwagi arrived home, she went to her room and phoned Saeki, who was waiting to hear the details of Kashiwagi’s long day.

Saeki: Hello, Mika speaking

Kashiwagi: Mikachii, it’s me Yukirin!!!

Saeki: Yukirin, how did it go? Are you at ease now?... Tell me…

Kashiwagi: It was ok, but actually I came back with more questions than answers..

Saeki: So what did Maeda wanted to talk about, is she ok?

Kashiwagi: ………she’s ok, but I really don’t know how to say this…

Saeki: Say what?.....If you tell me then I might be able to help Yukirin…..

Kashiwagi: You’re right Mikachii…..

Saeki: So…..

Kashiwagi: Well  Acchan said she……well….

Saeki: Stop prolonging, just day it already!!
Kashiwagi: She said she loves me!!!

Saeki was also struck by Maeda’s confession, and understood Kashiwagi’s predicament as she had also been in her position before.

Saeki: So what did you answer?

Kashiwagi: Nothing, I just don’t know how to answer, Mikachii….

Saeki: Wasn’t it the same between us?

Kashiwagi: Yes, but you answered my feelings promptly and honestly, but I don’t think I can do that, with Acchan….

Saeki: Yukirin, just think about how you feel when you’re with her, then decide based on that…….or am I holding you back?

Kashiwagi: No, Mikachii, no way, you never hold me back!!!!

Saeki: Then, what you want to do?

Kashiwagi: I’m not sure….

Saeki: Think about it and when you find your answer call me back!!! Have a nice rest!

Kashiwagi: Bye Mikachii!!

Even thought they didn’t see each other very often, they’re still connected, so Saeki’s advice really touched deep into Kashiwagi’s conscience. She turned off the lights on her room and went to sleep, hoping that by dawn she would’ve reached her answer.

The next morning Kashiwagi, woke and headed to the shower, fixed her bag and make-up, dressed with her favorite grey sweatpants and a black t-shirt, she ate breakfast, left home to attend practice. Maeda had arrived before any other members, the only people she knew on site were AKB theater staffers, waiting for the idols to arrive. Minutes later, Takahashi Minami arrived, when she saw Maeda, both greeted each other. Takahashi told Maeda that she saw her at the store in front of the Shiomode station. Feeling compelled to tell her friend what happened that day, Maeda said to Takahashi “I need to talk to you in private!” and then took Takahashi with her into a more secluded place for them to talk.

Takahashi: What is it Acchan, you seem a little anxious today!?

Maeda: Yesterday when you saw at the store I was buying a gift for someone….

Takahashi: Really……..who??

Maeda: I….I…asked Yukirin to meet me at Odaiba, for the day, I wanted…to discuss something with her.

Takahashi: So the gift was for Yukirin?

Maeda: Yes....

Takahashi: How did it g?....

Maeda: It….was…ok

Takahashi: Just ok? There is something you want to tell me that is not coming out, Acchan?

Maeda: Well….Yes…I…

Takahashi: You, what?

Maeda: I confessed to Yukirin, I told her that I love her….

Takahashi: YOU WHAT!???

Maeda: Yes….I told Yukirin that I love her!

This time Takahashi fell victim to catatonic immobility because of shock! She never thought that Maeda liked gals. She quickly regained her self-control, and turned her eyes to meet Maeda’s. While filled with mixed emotions, the joy her friend found someone, and the thought that person separating them. She took a deep breath to gather herself together. She look Maeda into her eyes and with a smile she continue the conversation.

Takahashi: Well....I…what did she say?

Maeda: She did know what to say, so we parted ways…I’m so anxious, what should I do Minami-chan?

Takahashi: Why are you asking me something like that!?....Well I think you should talk to Yukirin, and wait for her to respond, don’t pressure her.

Maeda: Are you mad at me?

Takahashi: Why would I be mad at you Acchan?

Maeda: Because, I…like a girl and....

Takahashi: Don’t be silly, you have the right to love anyone who feel that way whole heartedly. I mean, nothing is going to change between, we’re always going to be best friends, I matters to me, more that you’re happy. We’re friends forever and best friends, right? So if there is anything I can do for, you know you just have to ask. I’m sure everything is going to work between you and Yukirin!

Maeda: Yes, it’s true, best friends forever!

Takahashi and Maeda returned to the entrance, when they reached the hall almost everyone had arrived, except Kashiwagi. The staff decided to let the members present to go the changing room. Inside the changing room, Love-tan approached Maeda and asked “Did you talk with Yukirin about what you wanted?” a nervous Maeda replied “Yes, we did!” to which Love-tan responded with a sigh of relief. Watanabe was starring at the window, impatiently waiting for Kashiwagi to arrive, just like a little girl waits for her elder siblings to arrive. All of sudden a brown cab stop in front of the stadium, the back door to the right opened, as soon as the door opened an AKB staffer and a cameraman approached the cab to escort its passenger. A young lady with a long black straight hair, thin body, light make-up and exercise wardrobe emerged from the vehicle, she greeted the staff and accompanied by them she approached the main door.

Watanabe ran to see who this person might be, when she open the door she saw it was Kashiwagi. Her immediate reaction was to run fast and launch herself onto the arriving Kashiwagi, but unlike their usual greetings, their eyes didn’t meet. Different from before, Kashiwagi wasn’t looking at Watanabe but at someone else. It took just one second for the euphoric Watanabe to transform into a jealous ranting kid, as if she had some another person with a toy and her mother didn’t buy it to her. Watanabe release Kashiwagi and stood in between Kashiwagi and the dressing room, her eyes reflected all her displeasure and anger.

Watanabe: What’s wrong with you today, Yukirin? Why are you avoiding me?

Kashiwagi: I’m not avoiding you Mayu!

Watanabe: Then what’s wrong with you? Yu-ki-rin!?!

Kashiwagi: Aren’t you a bit old for this? I’m absolutely fine!

Watanabe felt devastated by Kashiwagi’s harsh response to her questioning. This was the first time, since they met that Kashiwagi responded so violently to Watanabe’s rants and demands for attention. Maeda totally oblivious of the situation, held with a strong grip Takahashi’s hand, while trying to relax, when Watanabe ruptured through the door like if she was escaping from the gates of the underworld. Everybody knew something had happened between Kashiwagi and Watanabe, which displeased strongly to the later. Moments later a cool and collected, following the image of an aristocrat that the group had of her, Kashiwagi entered to the dressing room, as if nothing had happened in the stadium entrance. Her eyes were immediately looking for Maeda, when she found her, she immediately smiled then rushed to her, Maeda noticed instantaneously that Kashiwagi was wearing the pendant she gave her during their “date”. 

A stage of our own 3: Chorus Angelicus

Maeda left home early and decided to walk to the subway station that was about 10 minutes from her residence. She decided to wear a marine blue skirt, a blue strapless shirt and a black jacket covering the shirt. On her way to the station she saw a small store that was selling pendants, when she saw the display, she went in and bought 2 identical ones-one for Yukirin and one for herself-then she proceeded to the station. When Maeda bought the pendants, she didn’t notice that Takahashi was nearby making errands and saw Maeda at the store. Takahashi was bit surprised that Maeda bought two identical, because when she usually gave presents to her close acquaintances she gave them different thing than those in her possession. Mean while Kashiwagi also left early, she was wearing a long yellow skirt a white long sleeve shirt and a soft blue vest on top of the shirt, she headed directly to the subway station after she heard the traffic report and to avoid commuter hours. She was carrying 2 obento she made all by herself. All the stress both ladies had during the night and early in the morning were turned into excitement during the hours previous to their “date”.

The first one to arrive was Maeda; she decided to wait for Kashiwagi in the bus stop in front of the Café. With just seconds to spare Kashiwagi arrived at the station where Maeda was waiting. They greeted each other with a huge smile then Kashiwagi said:

Kashiwagi: Sorry to make you wait, Acchan!

Maeda: No problem, actually I’ve just arrived, so I haven’t waited for a long time.

Kashiwagi: What a relief.

Maeda’s eyes were drawn to the bag Kashiwagi was carrying and asked “Yukirin what are carrying in that bag” Kashiwagi immediately replied “Oh, it’s a surprise that I hope you’ll like, should we go inside?” she asked. Maeda looked around, and saw an open table under the Café’s sun-setter, she then looked at Kashiwagi and said “Sure, let’s go!” she then grabbed Kashiwagi’s hand and crossed the street to the table. Soon after they took seat the waitress arrived and asked them what they wanted, both ordered a soft drink and then Maeda again asked Kashiwagi “Yukirin, please tell me what you have in that bag, please?!” this of course with Maeda’s stoic expression, to which Kashiwagi reacted with giggles and a refreshing smile and then said “Well I thought since we’re meeting near lunch time, I could try and cook something for us to eat”, she then picked the bag from the floor, placed it on the table and unpacked the bento boxes. She then timidly raised her sight to see Maeda’s reaction. When their eyes met, all their anxiety place was blown away in that long intense stare that broke into laughter. Maeda then asked “May I try it, Yukirin?” to which Kashiwagi in nervous tone replied “Please do, I hope Acchan likes it!” Maeda picked the chop-sticks and a bento, grabbed a bit in front of the nervous Kashiwagi’s eyes, she then giggled a bit, placed the chop-sticks on the table and drank a zip of her apple juice, making Kashiwagi even more nervous and less confident on her once proud cooking skills. The unsettling silence was too much for her to bear when all of a sudden Maeda’s tongue went loose:

Maeda: Yukirin, it’s………………………………………..

Kashiwagi: It’s what??? Say it already Acchan, you’re killing me!!!!

Maeda: It’s so delicious, Yukirin, may I have seconds?

Kashiwagi’s heart stopped for a second and then she burst into laughter after Maeda’s long and tense complement, she then knotted to Maeda’s request for seconds. Deep in Kashiwagi’s mind was still the need to know why Maeda asked her out. Maeda went to the ladies room to wash her hands and face, as she still couldn’t believe that she was in a date with Kashiwagi, when she was drying her hands, she remembered the pendants she bought on her way to the Café. She then returned to the table were Kashiwagi was waiting, as she sat in front, Maeda, quickly reached her jacket pocket and drew the pendant with one hand and held Kashiwagi’s hand with the other, she then placed her hand with the pendant on Kashiwagi’s and said:

Maeda: Please accept this gift as a sign of my appreciation towards you, Yukirin!

Kashiwagi: Sure, but what are you giving me?

Maeda then removed her hand covering the pendant, just to see Kashiwagi, dazzled by the gift she had just received, and bow in gratitude. Kashiwagi couldn’t keep herself quiet anymore, so she introduced the elephant hidden in the room to Maeda:

Kashiwagi: Acchan, why did you want to talk about with me?

Maeda: I……………………I’ll tell you later

Then Maeda took Kashiwagi by the hand and took her for a ride on the water bus to one of Tokyo’s most prestigious parks. Even though the gals were enjoying themselves together, the tension began to rise as sun set approached. It was almost sun set when they returned to Odaiba, and the difficult conversation began:

Kashiwagi: Are going to tell me what is so important, that you’ve been avoiding all this time, Acchan?

Maeda: Yes, about that, Yukirin there is something I want to tell you……

Maeda then crossed the street and stood in front of the bay, closely followed by Kashiwagi. Their heart beat, increased every second. The ladies were so delighted by the twilight they forgot about why they were there for a second. Encouraged by the scenery Maeda, took control of her fear of rejection from Kashiwagi, turned around and faced her, it was now or never, Maeda finally broke her silence:

Maeda: Yukirin……………..I……………

Kashiwagi: Yes, I’m listening Acchan, what is it??

Maeda: Is……is there someone you like? I mean someone you like more than a friend?

Kashiwagi: Some I like and more than a friend? You mean a guy? Noooooo, of course not!!!

Maeda: No, I don’t mean a guy, but is there someone in the group you like more than a friend??

Kashiwagi: Why are you asking me this, what’s wrong Acchan?

Maeda: ……………………………………………………………

Maeda was lost for words, she wanted to express her desire to be with Kashiwagi, but didn’t know how.

Kashiwagi: Well to be honest, there was someone, I was really close to……….

Maeda: Do you mean Mayuyu??

Kashiwagi: Mayuyu?. Hahahaha, no she’s just like my obnoxious little sister!!!

Maeda: Was that person part of AKB??

Kashiwagi: Yes, but I’m already over her departure, though when I was with her, it was as if our brains and bodies were linked together.

Maeda: Well, actually there is someone I like, more than a friend, there is this person I want to be with…………………………………….

When Kashiwagi heard, this she started to wonder who it could be. She thought the more she knew the better she could help her embattled friend. Kashiwagi found herself in a pinch, since she wanted to help her friend but she didn’t wanted to lose another special person to her as it happened before.

Kashiwagi: Is that person a guy? Acchan, if I can help, please let me, you’re worrying me….

Maeda: No…………….it’s not a guy, that’s what worries me, Yukirin, I think I’ve…………..

Kashiwagi: You’ve what??

Maeda: I………….think…………I have feelings for a girl

Kashiwagi was silent for a second after hearing, Maeda liked a girl, but she couldn’t stop wondering who this mystery lady might be. 

A stage of our own 2:Overture

Impressed and curious Kashiwagi and Love-tan ran to the changing room. Of course Kashiwagi had asked Oota to keep what happened in the hall as a secret until she talked to Maeda. When they arrived, Kashiwagi went looking for Takahashi, thinking she might know something. When she found her, Kashiwagi asked Takahashi “Takamina-san, have you seen Acchan?” immediately she replied: “Yes, she just left, in a bit of a hurry, I wonder why!?” Kashiwagi bowed to Takahashi in a thankful fashion for replying to her demand. Kashiwagi quickly changed and left. Watanabe Mayu was a bit startled by how quick she left, without saying a word to the rest, and asked Love-tan who had been with her “Love-tan, say what happened to Yukirin? She just left in a real hurry!” at the moment Love-tan sighted and turned to face Watanabe and reply in a cautious manner “I have no idea, maybe Yukirin is just tired!?” unease by Love-tan’s comment, thought that perhaps Katayama Haruka might know more and clam her curiosity, she then approached Katayama and asked “Haachan, do you know what’s wrong with Yukirin, she just left abruptly” Katayama replied “I have no idea, Acchan left before her in the same fashion, maybe its related?” which instead of easing Watanabe, made her worried even more curious.

Mean while, Kashiwagi was lying in her bed, re-reading the letter Maeda gave her. After a few minutes staring at it she slaps herself and went to her mother for advice. Whilst on the other end Maeda, anxiously waited on her mobile for Kashiwagi’s e-mail. Both gals were unsure and nervous of what the other had to say, but at the same time desired for the other’s reply.

On the other hand, the weary Watanabe decides in a bold move to call Kashiwagi as she believes the answer given to her by Love-tan was to mislead her, since she knew something was happening. It was around 1900(7 pm) when the phone rang at Kashiwagi’s home, her mother called to her “Yuki-chan, Mayu-chan is on the phone, please hurry up and answer!” at that moment she had just come out of the shower, dropped her towel, put a shirt on then answer the phone:

Kashiwagi: Hello, Yuki speaking

Watanabe: Yukirin, are you alright...I’m worried since you left in such a hurry after the concert, I tried to ask Love-tan and Haachan but neither of them told me a thing, are you alright?

For a moment the only noise on the phone, was that of static, Kashiwagi was worried that Watanabe might have found out about the letter Maeda gave her and replied:

Kashiwagi: I’m alright; there is no reason for you to worry! What did Love-tan told you Mayuyu?

Watanabe: Just that you were tired and nothing, else, are you really ok?

Kashiwagi: Yeah, don’t worry, I’m ok, I just need to rest

Watanabe: Ok, bye! Have a good rest!

Kashiwagi and Watanabe hanged up their phones, but Watanabe wasn’t feeling assured by Kashiwagi’s answer, she felt as if she was in certain peril. Kashiwagi went and gave her parents a good night hug and kiss, she went back to her room and shut down the lights except the one of her night table, and read again the letter, while she held her mobile on with the right hand as she remembered her mother’s advice “your friend probably only needs to vent out, so you just have to listen to what she has to say then you may think about what to answer or advice, you lose nothing from listening, perhaps in the end it will be something nice for you” she then gathered herself together, closed her eyes and took a deep breath, she then slowly opened her mobile, check her speed dial for Maeda’s number and started writing an e-mail response to the letter and blushed so much she was as red as a tomato.

Maeda was about to fall asleep, when her mobile rang, she rushed as if her life depended on it. She held her phone so tight and strong, while checked for the mail sender, all of the sudden a huge smile pop out her face and her eyes were opened as big as the moon when she read: SENDER: YUKIRISO. Her heart beat, went crazy as she slowly read the reply:

“Acchan, sorry to reply this late to your letter. If you are available tomorrow, it would be great to meet. Please choose the time and place, I’ll surely be there!

                                          Yuki”

Maeda fell on her bed, and started to roll on it, she was so happy, that she fell asleep. The next morning, just after breakfast, Kashiwagi received a call on her mobile, she quickly rushed to answer:

Kashiwagi: Hello, Yuki speaking

Maeda: Yukiriso, it’s me Acchan!!! Yesterday, I received your reply, sorry to bother you this early, since you said we could meet today………………….

Kashiwagi: Sure no problem, where should we meet, Acchan?

Maeda: You know, there is this new amazing café in Odaiba, if it’s ok with why don’t we meet there?

Kashiwagi: Oh, really? Odaiba is very close to my home, so it’s perfect for me! At what time?

Maeda: My house is also close to Odaiba, what a coincidence!? Does 1130 sounds good to you?

Kashiwagi: Sure!

Maeeda: *sighs* Yukiriso, would you like to spend the day with me?

All of a sudden a threatening pause halts the conversion; both ladies could hear the other’s heart beat as the tension after Maeda’s question rises. Kashiwagi sighs a couple times in the following seconds after Maeda’s strange proposal. Then to stop such an uncomfortable moment, Maeda resumes the conversation:

Maeda: are you ok, Yukiriso?

Kashiwagi: yes, I just got…………..surprised a little

Maeda: then will you spend the day with me?

Kashiwagi: sure, why not, this is going to be fun!!!

Maeda: great, well then see you at Eigo’s Café at 1130 in Odaiba! Until then, see you!!

Kashiwagi: Sure, see you Acchan!!

The conversation lasted just a few minutes but for both gals it felt like an eternity, when they both hanged the phones they took a deep breath and deep sigh, blushed, just by the thought of spending the entire afternoon together.

Third part is on the workshop....................so stay tuned, the good stuff is coming your way!!